Cup 8 - Colleen

February 23, 2014

I realize I didn't publish any Terms of Agreement prior to embarking on this resolution and so I hope this eighth cup of coffee isn't violating anyone's preconceived notions about my plans.  I ran into Colleen by accident and so our reunion wasn't premeditated. But it was a very happy surprise and so it's too bad these things don't happen more often!

Colleen and I taught in the same middle school together for eight (?) years.  As happens, when we both moved to different schools, so too did the amount of time we spent together shift.  I saw her, unexpectedly last week at a work related presentation, and then again this week at Teachers Convention and so took advantage of some abbreviated time together to catch up.

Colleen is a friend of contradictions.  She has a personality that can be boisterous and larger-than-life, but a soft and sensitive side that moves people.  The heart she has for family, friends and students is overflowing but her wittiness and sense-of-humour keeps all of us on our toes!  Although she has had to battle the health challenges impacting herself and her family, she is also a never-say-no goal setter who climbed a mountain on a milestone birthday a decade ago, and is planning a marathon bike ride to mark an upcoming one.  As a band teacher she is one of those colleagues who I have always said I think walks on water (Band teachers, Kindergarten teachers and Grade 8 teachers) but her talents and perseverance extend beyond the job.  A special memory I hold of Colleen was at her wedding, 7 years ago, where I took Derek on our first date as an exclusive couple, introducing him there to my friends for the first time.  (Also, we got to sit in the very front row because, of course thanks to D, we arrived late. I think we walked down the aisle right before the wedding party...) 

It was wonderful to see Colleen recently.  Wonderful to reconnect, even if only for a few unscheduled moments.

Cup 7 - Sherise

February 16, 2014

If you were anything like me, in elementary school we all agonized over who our "best friend" was....that day.  If you didn't spend every spare moment and recess with this person, the friendship was clearly in jeopardy.  Once junior high arrived we allowed ourselves a little more flexibility in that we might have multiple "best friends" at the same time.  But membership into this club was generally tenuous, with degrees of "best" existing on a sliding scale and with even some of the people we wished were our "bests" not feeling the same way about us.

As much as we may often say we'd like to be a kid again, it's not for those reasons!  Thank goodness adults "get" that our closest friends need not be ones we see very often or even talk and text with weekly or daily.  Sherise and I have known each other for close to 25 years. Yes, there are other very important people in my life who I have known and kept in touch with for even longer, but when I think of my very BEST bff, I don't have to think about how to fill in that blank.  

Although she lives nearby, prior to having lunch together this weekend, I hadn't seen her since early December.  This made me calculate that we might see each other 6-8 times a year.  I know this is clearly more often than I see most people I might blog about in 2014, but considering how important her friendship is to me, I cherish the times we carve out for each other and each time is worth its own recognition.

We met during university, both waitressing at Nick's Steakhouse.  Industry life includes much time socializing and so our bond grew over glasses of wine, trips to Crazy Horse, weekends in Invermere and other life experiences (boyfriends!) which helped us navigate becoming "grown-ups" as we faced the prospect of the rest-of-our-lives.  One of the things that sets Sherise apart from so many other close friends in my life is the fact that she isn't a teacher and so our conversations naturally veer in other directions.  While we have much in common, I think our differences - professional lives being one - complement our relationship.  She is a talented, successful, corporate big-wig, working in telecommunications and leading large teams of people with grace and skill.  I smile-and-nod a lot when she talks about her job.  She is also bold and emotional (in a sophisticated way).  If she isn't voicing her opinions (eloquently) she is definitely conveying her feelings through her facial expressions.  (I've never played poker with Sherise....okay, maybe once, 20+ years ago....but that's not for this blog... but I bet I'd win as "poker face" will never be her strength).  Further to our differences, but added to the list of qualities I admire, is her being a loving mom, a patient wife (actually, we have THIS in common), a dedicated sister and a fashionista extraordinaire!  This girl has two closets full of clothes, shoes, jewelry and accessories to-die for.  Even a date to Starbucks gets the full treatment.

Yesterday afternoon at Earl's we enjoyed lunch and coffee (finally!), professional talk about career, updates about kids, girl-talk about shopping, catching up about Christmas and New Year's and anticipated going to see Lady GaGa together in May then Michael Buble in June.  (Although hopefully it isn't May before we get to get together again.)  Our visit was overdue, as it usually is. The time passed quickly, as it always does.

The descriptions in this blog may not seem to delve very deep but don't we hear all the time that love is impossible to define anyway?  Derek and I had a small, 16 guest, family-only wedding. But Sherise was there.  Actually, that's a great way to sum her up.  She's family.  But one of the rare members you get to choose!

It was great to see her.  It has been great telling you about her!

Cup 6 - Dean and Annie

February 9, 2014

It may seem odd that I'm acknowledging a reconnection with people I have known for less than 2 years, but it's equally as strange to me I could have let 10 months pass since the last time I saw two people whose home I can literally see from my front window!

Dean and Annelize (and their lovely son, Luc) were introduced to us through mutual friends when they brought them to a house party. Dean and Annie moved here from South Africa in December 2011 and are currently in the legal throes of earning the right to stay in Canada.  A more deserving, hard-working, and honest family you'd be hard pressed to meet.  But this blog isn't intended to preach any sort of political opinion.  Rather, I want to awe at their courage and perseverance.

I know many families have done it, and their reasons are vast and legitimate.  But I don't know if I could!  Uproot my whole life and move to another city....country.....continent....climate?!  I'm such a homebody that leaving my quadrant of the city on the weekend is a huge deal.  Every member of my immediate family, in 4 different addresses, all live in a neighbouring community within a 5 minute drive from us.  Not only did Dean and Annelize take this plunge but, upon arrival, also took the initiative to make connections and we are fortunate to be one of those.  Kids make friends pretty naturally.  Adults don't always find it quite so seamless.

Since meeting them, during those first few months we enjoyed Christmas parties, Aussie Rules, backyard barbeques, and drop-in cups of coffee.  Naturally (?!) they lived in South Calgary for most of this!  They now live in Tuscany but the last time Derek and I saw all three of them was when they were guests of honour, with our families, at Easter Dinner at our place last April. Which is where those 10 months have passed!   Crazy!

Today is Annelize's birthday and so we were invited there tonight for  a wonderful meal, cooked by her (on HER birthday....are the traditions that different in South Africa?!).  It was casual, light, fun and overdue.  I was reminded again how brave and optimistic they are to be tackling this adventure.  I was reminded about how impressive it is they sought out friends and connections with new people.  I need to continue to demonstrate similar initiative, even just by continuing to seek out those I have already met.  And they won't all be right outside my window!

Cup 5 - The Staff at RJ Hawkey School

February 2, 2014

PART 1 - Thursday Night (January 30th) - 6:51pm

It is the eve of my last day at my favourite place I have ever worked.  While making cotton candy at Calaway Park in the 80's was fun, and over-serving Grey Cup champion Stampeders in Nick's Lounge was entertaining (and lucrative!), the past 5 and a half years at RJ Hawkey have meant more to me than I am going to be able to express here...

I bought Thank You cards.  For every person.  Beautiful ones!  My plan was to pen a handwritten note to each person, telling them individually what I have appreciated and will remember about them.  But now the task seems too hard.  This is partly because I am sitting beside Brier, wondering how much more time he and I will have together.  Days?  A week?  It's more comforting to sit on the floor and type, with my hip touching his, than to hunch over a table writing, even if we were in the same room together.....  I am also reticent to write the cards because I am very tired.  With every day that draws nearer to my taking over at Ralph McCall, my head fills up with more information, my body resists health (go away head-cold!) and the insomnia visits for a little bit longer.  These people deserve better than the effort my current energy level could give them tonight.  And the final reason I can't write them is because, given that these two paragraphs alone have taken me over an hour to type, there isn't possibly enough time! I can't stop crying!  Yes, this is probably partially because of the previous two reasons, but also because I'm trying to picture what tomorrow will be like.  There's no way I see myself getting through the day without needing a box full of Kleenex and without having to hope upon hope that no one captures my ugly-crying-face on their iPhone.

But tomorrow will be very special and meaningful, and I will have even more to say about all of the fabulous people at RJ by this weekend.  I'm certain of it.  So I will defer the task until then....

PART 2 - Saturday Afternoon (February 1st) - 3:07pm

I woke up this morning as the principal of a different school, but felt so satisfied with the incredible day of closure that was yesterday.  It was perfect.  Really, I couldn't have asked for a more wonderful day and I feel very blessed.  

I met kids outside in the morning and wandered the school Friday with a continuation of the previous night's tears ready to flow at a moment's notice.  Once or twice a few may have leaked out.  But when it came time to spend a final assembly with everyone in my incredible RJ family, I think I held myself together pretty well (didn't I?).  We got silly and had fun (human bowling anyone?), there were surprises (I arranged for Brier to make an appearance - in his new Radio Flyer wagon! - to mark his retirement as RJ's dog-with-a-job), there were kids saying the sweetest things on video, there was music (Gayla rewrote the words of the school song and the students sang!), and there was the presentation of the most meaningful piece of artwork I will ever receive.  The afternoon was awesome.  And then in the evening, the grown-ups gathered again where we ate, drank, visited, and sang and laughed....and laughed....and laughed (if you were there - you know what I'm talking about!).  There was even another amazing gift.   Wow, it was just a perfect day! There aren't enough thanks; and thanks aren't enough anyway.

Since this blog is supposed to be about the important people in my life, I want to devote some words to gushing about them.  It is only because of the people at RJ Hawkey that I even feel remotely prepared for this next chapter in my career.  I hope to lead in the example of what they have taught me:  to always value excellence, to honour professionalism, to take risks, to listen longer and harder, that we gain energy from laughing together, that little kids are ridiculous sometimes but all so worthy of our time, attention and love, that I can mix leadership with friendship and that no challenge is too big when we focus on it together.  Thank you to everyone for their honesty, hard work, time, talent and tears.  You are an incredible group of people.  From Karen and Gayla and Jackie - who have been at RJ longer than they are probably comfortable with me referencing, to Sarah - who has only been there for about 20 minutes, from all the great teachers I have worked with in past years, to the incredible support staff we would be paralyzed without, you are an awesome, amazing team.  I thank you so sincerely for the almost six years I spent with each of you.  I plan to keep in touch and hope to hear that you are always taking care and looking out for each other.

I received so many lovely notes and cards, several with wonderful quotes.  My favourite:

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.  ~Winnie the Pooh